Really long bicycle ride (but not a tour)

Okay I've only really go one thing on my mind right now and that is my upcoming long bicycle ride. Some people call it a tour but I call it a long bicycle ride because as a recovering elitist bicycle racer, touring is just one of the things that you always told yourself you would never do. Kind of like wearing one of those helmet mounted rear view mirrors. Or riding around all of the time with a goofy one piece aero bar jacked up all comfy-like (think early nineties triathlon.) You just never think you'll get to that point. I've gotten to that point. I haven't ridden my race bike but once all season. I regularly ride for pleasure on a bicycle that has a front and rear rack. I ride to work on a bastardized cyclocross bike with panniers and a blinking tail light. I have hair on my legs. I will admit, and this is very, very hard for me, that I have considered purchasing one of those afore mentioned helmet mounted rearview mirrors. I am unrecognizable to myself.

I've known it would happen, in the back of my mind, for a while. I saw how the changes presented themselves in the older masters racers when I was still racing. These weren't the pack filler riders either, these were the guys that were winning races, wearing national champion jerseys, pioneers in American cycling, guys that you just knew were real bad asses when they were younger. And now some of these guys were wearing helmet mirrors all of the time. Guys riding on disk wheels all of the time, even for cyclocross and mountain bike races. Guys who only wore skinsuits despite the fact that they are hot, uncomfortable and have no pockets. Guys who used weird gear, like aerodynamic water bottles, even in long road races where such trinkets couldn't possibly have any positive effect. So yeah, I knew that old road racers get weirder and weirder as time goes on. I figure it must have something to do with the constant oxygen deficit that accompanies years of hard training. And now it's happened to me.

Here's the thing. Despite the fact that I just absolutely adore bicycles, I don't really want to ride my bike anymore. Unless, that is, I can ride it someplace in particular. You see, for years I've ridden thousands and thousands of miles a year and gotten...nowhere. I rode all of those miles just for the sake of riding miles. And I no longer want to do that. I want to ride my bicycle somewhere. I don't care where; it could be work, or the grocery store, my family reunion in Michigan, or, my favorite, The Beer King corner store. Just so long as I set out with some destination in mind. Sure, occasionally I'll get a hankering to hit the road just for the hell of it, usually on a nice sunny summer day (which is pretty rare in itself around here) but for the most part, I don't want to go out and ride the same tired loops that I've forced myself to ride inumerable times before just to get in another, say, 30 miles. Now a 900 mile bicycle ride, that's something that gets my blood pumping. As long as I don't call it a tour. Because deep down inside I'm still that smooth legged guy who absolutely must have the lightest possible wheels on the lightest possible frame. The guy wearing the massively logoed jersey and 25 function heart rate monitor. The guy who just absolutely has to go out and ride 30 miles in the rain because that's what his training program says. Wait, now I'm not sure which version of myself is crazier.