think green

Here's a good example of the kind of doofus I usually encounter on the fine roads and highways of this great nation of ours. Yesterday I'm riding home from work and it hasn't really been raining all day for a switch so I tack on some extra miles just for the hell of it. There are plenty of inconsiderate drivers on the road because it's July 3rd and everybody is in a great big yank to get their giant travel trailers and various recreational vehicles up into the woods so they can hurry the hell up and relax. So I try to stay off of well traveled roads and I have a nice little ride. Until I get about three miles from my house, on that very same road/bicycle route that I almost got banged up on the day before by the Subaru. This road is a 35 mph residential road, by the way, but that doesn't stop people from acting stupid. In the space of about two minutes I almost got sideswiped by two vehicles, both of them in a situation very similar to the last one, where somebody could slow down for 2 seconds to let an oncoming car go by before they pass me, but that would take up too much precious time so they stuff their giant land yacht in between me and the oncoming car, nearly taking me out with the sideview mirror and simultaneously almost getting in a head-on collision. Brilliant. Anyway, the first one is some kind of SUV that is tailgating the shit out of some other car. It's likely that he didn't even know I was there because he couldn't see through the car in front of him that was bringing down his average speed on the way to happy hour. Or to beat his kids or whatever he does after work. The second one was a battered mini-van that had no excuse for almost taking me out unless, of course, it was because the driver was text messaging or something. Here's the best part. The van had a sticker that said "think green." Admirable thought for sure but I'm wondering how "think green" and "kill a bike commuter" fit together in a sentence. Happy Indepencence Day. Go Red White and Blue.