Black Friday musings

Another Black Friday has come and gone and, fortunately, with fewer fatalities than usual. If reading that last sentence made you feel patriotic, then you are not my intended audience, please stop reading. If it made you think " we are the legion of the damned," then congratulations, you can stay. No, really, it is good news. I don't want to see anyone maimed or worse over a really unbelievable deal on a flat screen television. But you can't go putting yourself in harms way without fear of consequences. If you haven't figured it out yet, finding yourself in a Walmart store during the predawn hours is an indication that you are not doing something right. It's just fortunate that enough people are unemployed right now, and thus unable to get really excited about any doorbuster special, that the crowds were less unruly than usual. To Walmart's credit, they did take some measures this year to prevent a recurrence of the tragedy that took place in their Valley Stream NY store a year ago when a shopper was trampled to death. For instance, they stayed open through the night on Thanksgiving day, thus diluting the concentration of people who would normally be storming the doors 4:00 am. Smart. They also beefed up security so that altercations could be handled quickly and without loss of life. According to the New York Times, the worst Black Friday hooliganism of 2009 occurred at a Walmart store in Upland CA, forcing authorities to close the store for a few hours when fights broke out over merchandise. Let's think about this for a minute. The main reason for shopping on Black Friday is to buy Christmas gifts, right? So, presumably, these folks setting the alarm clock for 3:00 am and heading out to Walmart are Christians, right? Does it not seem kind of un-Christian to assault someone over cheap merchandise?

The day after Thanksgiving is called Black Friday because it was traditionally the day that retail establishments moved into "the black," or became profitable for the year. This doesn't really happen anymore, but that's beside the point. There are other reasons to call it Black Friday. Retail sales people call it Black Friday because it is the worst day of the year. Having to get up at an inhuman hour to go to work and deal with crazed consumers and then stay late to put a ransacked store back together, all for a wage that comes in somewhere under the poverty level, can be discouraging. And of course, there is the danger. Black Friday is most likely the deadliest day of shopping all year. I'd like to see some traffic statistics. Not only are you likely to come to fisticuffs with your fellow shoppers, anytime you have a convergence of giant sport utility vehicles such as you have in the typical Walmart parking lot, you are bound to have accidents and examples of road rage. Murderous Friday, maybe, would be more accurate.

It's nice to have Black Friday as an add on special day for the Thanksgiving weekend. Spend some time with your family, have a nice meal and contemplate the things you have to be thankful for. Maybe watch some football. better take a nap too, because tomorrow is going to be grueling. Get up early on Friday and put your game face on. It's time to consume. Thankful my ass. Repeat your mantra "must own Blu Ray, must own Blu Ray." You are not taking no for an answer. You have HD TVs in your house that do not have Blu Ray players and you are not going out like that. "Listen lady, I did not get up at 3:00 am to come home empty handed. Now give me that Blu Ray player or I'll slash the tires on your Amigo!"